Dare to be Different, Dare to be Strong, Dare to be Responsible
Where a boy can be a boyTM
A frank discussion from a father's point of view on such topics as:
Domestic violence is not just a family matter.
It takes place behind closed doors, but its effects reveberate throughout society. We see some of its results in homeless shelters, emergency rooms, and unemployment lines.
Even more overlooked are the effects of domestic violence on children. One to ten children in the U.S. are exposed to domestic violence and the majority of them are under six years old.
Witnessing family violence is a traumatic experience; seeing or hearing a family member being threateded or beaten can shatter a young child's sense of safety and security, with long-term consequences for brain development and emotional well-being.
Almost 3 in 10 Memphians are victims of domestic violence each year and in about half of these reported incidents children are present.
Witnessing high levels of domestic violence can have lifelong effects on a child’s cognitive, emotional, and social development.
Memphis’ rate of domestic violence is the highest in Tennessee. With the current economic crisis, our community’s domestic violence problem has become more urgent than ever. When unemployment goes up, so does domestic violence.
What is Conflict?
Everyone gets angry at one time or another.
Conflict happens all the time. A clash or disagreement between people.
Too often, minor disagreements lead to serious violence among teens.
How does conflict resolution work?
Conflict resolution is about teaching young boys new ways to work through and resolve disputes that don't involve violence.
I don't know why I am angry!!!!
Making boys aware of how important it is to make responsible choices. Educating them on the life changing events that happen when you enter fatherhood especailly when you are still an adolestant yourself. Teaching them its okay to wait and teaching them to be okay with their dissions when every body else around them is having sex.
I am only one, but still I am one. I cannot do everything, but still I can do something; And because I cannot do everything I will not refuse to do the something that I can do.
1. Look Within You--What Do You Feel?
2. Look Behind You---What Have You Learned
3. Look Around You---What Is Happening To Others?
4. Look Ahead of You ---What Is The Big Pictures?
5. Look Above You---What Does God Expect of You?
No Child should Die in the Dawn of the Night!
Do we as men/boys even know what Infant Mortality is?
How do will feel when one of our children die? Who are we angry at? Is it the mother's fault? How does this affect our selfesteem and value system as a man? How do we deal with our loss? Are we suppose to feel anything? grief. Did I play a role in my child not having a fighting chance to live? Do well tell our boys about how sad and hurt we are? Or do we just suck it up like it ain't nothing?
Well you know what! It is something! Our babies are dying at an alarming rate like we are some third world country.
Let's have a real talk about it.
The piercing reality of fathers absenteeism and the stratigic impacts that it has on the children the family, and our community as a whole.
We must look at the devastating out comes of our children growing up fatherless.
3 Principles for training your child
1. Train them by example.
2. Train them by example.
3. Traing them by example.
Fathers Lets Real Talk About This!!!!
What is a Man!
1. What does he look like?
2. Where does he live?
3. How do I find him?
4. How do I become a man?
5. What will I need to become a man?
6. Who will teach me to be a man?
7. Are men allow to have emotions?
8. Isn't it forbidden for a man to cry?
9. When I am afraid can I still be a man?
10. Sometimes I don't know which direction I should go, can I still be a man?
GROWING UP CAN BE TOUGH!
Bullies can make your whole day tough. They harass....They bother.....They try to get you in trouble....They Make You Angry!!!!!!
Helping our Kids to Manage Money
1. Bank On It
2. Check It Out
3. Setting Financial Goals
4. Pay Yourself First
5. Borrowing Basics
6. Charge It Right
7. Paying for College and Cars
8. A Roof Over Your Head
A POSITIVE ENCOUNTER
It does not involve telling a young person what to do and what not to do. The prupose of a Positive Encounter is to support a young person in making his or her own healtly decisions, not to criticize or judge those decisions the advocate disagrees with. An advocate does not try to deceive or frighten a young person about sex, nor to focus only on the risks and dangers associated with sexual behavior. Fanally, the goal is not to fix a young person's problem or miraculously transform him or her into a sexuall healthy adult, but to enable the teen to learn the problem-solving and decision-making skills which will be valuable throughout life.
Have you ever been in a situation where your friends have asked you to perform something that you knew was wrong? Yet you went out and did it, so that you could be a part of that group. Did you feel right about it, was it worth the effort? We have all gone through some form of “Peer Pressure” in our lives. Is “Peer Pressure” bad or good?
Peer Pressure is the pressure to do certain things, to act in a particular way, and to look like you belong to a specific group. It is an influence to fit into a particular lifestyle. Depending on the type of influence “Peer Pressure” can be good or it can be bad. When someone is encouraging and supportive and is trying to influence you to do the right thing, where it will improve you and not harm you or others, then it is a good thing. On the other hand when you are encouraged to do wrong things, then it is bad.
TO MY CHILD
Just for this morning I am going to smile when I see your face and laugh when I feel like crying.
Just for this morning I will let you choose what you want to to wear and smile and say how perfect it is.
Just for this morning I will leave the dishes in the sink and let you teach me how to put that puzzle of your together.
Just for this afternoon, I will unplug the telephone and keoop the computer off and sit with you in the backyard and blow bubbles.
Just for this afternoon, I will take us to McDonald's and buy us both a Happy Meal so you can have both toys.
Just for this evening, I will let you splash in the tub and not get angry.
Just for this evening, I will snuggle beside you and miss my favorite TV show.
And when I kiss you goodnight, I will hold you a little tighter, a little longer. It is then that I will thank God for you, and ask Him for nothing, except one more day.
Research shows that parents can play an important role in preventing young people from joining gangs. Also negative influences within a family, such as domestic violence, child abuse, inconsistent or harsh arenting practices, and /or drug or alcohol abuse by family members, can increase the risk that a youngster will join a gang.
If you would like to schedule a Real Talk Session on one of our topics for your youth group, class room or church.
Please contact Boys Inc. and leave a message for Mr. Reginald Johnson an 901.500.0448 and he will return your call as soon as possible.
“It is easier to build strong children than to fix broken men.”
– attributed to Frederick Douglass
“Tell them we need hope.”
– a Katrina child’s plea to America
Millions of our children are bleeding from many wounds that we have the means but not the love and will as a nation to prevent and heal. Our Creator did not make two classes of children. It is our responsibility and within our power to make our nation see and protect all our children as the sacred gifts they are and not just as fodder for war, the prison industry or as a consumer market.
We adults must regain our moral bearing and teach our children that the most important things in life are not things but love, justice, respect, service and integrity.
We must challenge ourselves, our families, religious, cultural, media and government leaders, and citizens to make our children’s health, safety, education, family and community life our overarching national purpose.
Every citizen must demand that our leaders commit, as a condition of our vote, to:
• Ensure every child and pregnant woman in America health insurance for all medically necessary services now.
• Lift every child from poverty by 2015.
• Get every child ready for school through full funding of quality Early Head Start and Head Start, child care and new investments in quality preschool education for all.
• Protect all children from neglect, abuse and other violence and ensure them the permanent families they need when their families break down.
• Make sure every child can read by fourth grade and can graduate from school able to succeed at work and in life.
• Provide every child safe, quality after-school and summer programs so they can learn, serve, work and stay out of trouble.
• End child hunger through adequate child and family nutrition investments.
• Ensure every child a place called home and every family decent affordable housing.
• Ensure families the supports needed to be successful in the workplace, including health care, child care, education and training.
• Create jobs with a living wage.
We are guilty of many errors and many faults but our worst crime is abandoning the children, neglecting the fountain of life. Many of the things we need can wait. The child cannot. Right now is the time his bones are being formed, his blood is being made, and his senses are being developed.To him we cannot answer “Tomorrow.” His name is “Today!
”—Gabriela Mistral, Chilean poet, educator, Nobel Laureate
As parents, adults, citizens and leaders we must examine ourselves regularly to determine whether we are contributing to the crisis our children face or to the solutions they urgently need. And if we are not a part of the solution, we are a part of the problem and need to do better.
Our children don’t need or expect us to be perfect. They do need and expect us to be honest, to admit and correct our mistakes, and to share our struggles about the meanings and responsibilities of faith, parenthood, citizenship and life.
Before we can pull up the moral weeds of violence, materialism and greed in our society and world that are strangling so many of our children, we must pull up the moral weeds in our own homes, backyards, neighborhoods, institutions and public policies. So many children are confused about what is right and wrong because so many adults talk right and do wrong in our personal, professional and public lives.
It is time for adults of every race and income group to break our silence about the pervasive breakdown of moral, family, community and national values, to place our children first in our lives, and to struggle to model the behavior we want our children to learn.
Our “child and youth problem” is not a child and youth problem, it is a profound adult problem as our children do what they see us adults doing in our personal, professional and public lives.
They seek our attention in negative ways when we provide them too few positive ways to communicate and to get the attention and love they need.